Weekend Tedium

It is strange how the school years seem to roll together into one long singular experience. Week ater week I find myself faced with task after task, accomplishing them as best I can, one at a time. Weekend after weekend, faced with nothing but drinking and whoring and not sleeping. These weeks of constant work followed by two days of constant play seem to drag on after a while. I feel very lucky to be in school, but nonetheless, there are times when the tedious grind of study becomes very tiresome to me. So tedious that on weekends, acts of debaucery idiocy are the only things that make sense. It's almost being like suspended in this fantasy world between childhood and adulthood, during the weeks accepting my more mature responsibilities, and on the weekends totally rejecting them. I feel that college kids in general are concsiously holding onto thier youth, knowing that in four or six short years it'll be over. The urge to binge seems to be such a common thread among young twenty somethings that it almost seems normal to see kids puking, fighting, taking drugs, and acting like fools, as much as it's normal to see them reading and studying in a library. Is this how we're supposed to act? Do people ever really break free from this period of suspended growth, or do we just accept our lives for what they are, and try and take the good and bad throughout all life. As I sit here, with three hours of sleep since Thursday, I question my intentions in life. It seems that at times partying and drinking and drugging are quintessential experiences to young life, and yet, there is a part of me which almost feels that this sort of lifestyle isn't experience at all, but instead just a distraction, meant to keep us complacent under the weight of our lives and responsibities. And yet all of me remains complacent to not care, as I surely wouldn't live any other way at the moment.